I guess perspective really is everything.

Three Days of Green: Dow Soars Above 7000

If you had told me a year ago that the above headline would make any sense at all…

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Filed under: Commerce

Get your shit together.

TechBirmingham’s Ecycling Day March 21@ Vulcan Park

Please join us for TechBirmingham’s Ecycling Day at the Clover Crawl on Saturday, March 21, 2009 from 10 AM to 4 PM in the lower parking lot of Vulcan Park.  Technical Knock Out will be on had to assist TechBirmingham with accepting all old electronics except for television sets.

Technical Knock Out will destroy hard drives of donated devices for you. Also, I’m volunteering. So don’t act like you ain’t curious.

Filed under: F*ck off, Earth!, Geeking Out, I Boss You, IRL

Why should he be?

Obama on Spot Over a Benefit to Gay Couples

Mr. Obama is in a tough spot. If he supports…denying [same sex partner] benefits to the San Francisco court employees, he risks agitating liberal groups that helped him win election. If he supports the judges and challenges the marriage act, he risks alienating Republicans with whom he is seeking to work on economic, health care and numerous other matters.

Risks alienating them? Roll the fucking dice, Barry. What’ll really happen? Hayseeds everywhere will think you’re a gay Islamic terrorist alien Socialist abortionist? Whip out a stack of Franklins and blow that political capital on coke and whores. Gay whores. Gay whores whose life partners deserve the same benefits ours do.

Is it lost on Obama that, owing to prejudiced laws like DOMA, his own parents wouldn’t have been allowed to marry in a third of our states until he was six years old? I don’t think it can be. I understand he’s pretty bright.

Gary L. Bauer, president of American Values, a conservative advocacy group, said that if Mr. Obama extended benefits to same-sex partners of federal workers, he would “provoke a furious grass-roots reaction, reinvigorate the conservative coalition and undermine his efforts to portray himself as a moderate on social issues.”

A “furious grass-roots reaction?” You mean like a “[S]econd American revolution” or something? Somebody call the cops (only hide the coke and gay whores first).

Fuck the bigots and fuck their votes. It’s 2009, and this is no less than a moral imperative.

Filed under: Get Your Hate On, I Call Bullsh*t, That's F*cked Up, Welcome Change

Bitches. Just bitches.

Conservatives angry over Michelle Obama’s trip to homeless shelter

“Today’s ‘poor’ are the rich Jesus warned you about: fat, slovenly, wasteful of their money and other people’s…”

— Psychotic Hellspawn Kathy Shaidle

I’m not sure any further commentary is called for here.

Filed under: Get Your Hate On, That's F*cked Up

Colbert Nation: Mobilize!

MSNBC: Stephen Colbert guns for space station title

I think it’s hysterical when stodgy, square, struggling-to-stay-relevant traditional* media try to cover hip, relevant things the better to appear hip and relevant.**

Anyway, this is where you go if you want to subvert what was likely a well-intentioned attempt by NASA to make the public more aware of the space program. You know, like I did.

* Since I’m sleeping with an editor, and to prove I’m not a heartless bitch: I found this column by Nancy Mitchell of the recently-shuttered Rocky Mountain Times quite poignant.

**Or when they do things like use Twitter. Or when they Twitter. Or Tweet. Or encourage you to leave a Tweet. Whathefuckever.

Filed under: Dropping Science, Geeking Out, I Boss You, Things that tickle me

Is it time to freak out now?

Dow Below 6,800; Lowest Close Since ’97

If not, tell me when it is. I’ll be cleaning out the bedroom my parents will move into.

Oh yeah. In my despondency, I almost forgot:

Your obligatory anguished trader reaction shot

They’re even better here.

Filed under: Commerce, That's F*cked Up, You Boss Me

Do this thing that I tell you now to do.

Make an album cover. Do this. Do it now.

1 – Go to Wikipedia. Hit “random”
or click http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 – Go to Quotationspage.com and select “random quotations”
or click http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four or five words of the very last quote on the page is the title of your first album.

3 – Go to Flickr and click on “explore the last seven days”
or click http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover. You may need to do a screencap to get the picture.

4 – Use Photoshop, Paint, or similar to put it all together.

5 – Send or link me to sexy results.

via: Ruthless Forum’s [Stone Cold] Nerd Pen

Filed under: Geeking Out, I Boss You, Things that tickle me